Understanding Engineers - Take One
To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass Is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
Understanding Engineers - Take Two
An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and
said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over,
picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and
said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a
beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The engineer took the
frog out of his pocket,smiled at it and returned it to the pocket.
The frog then cried out,
"If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess,
I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want." Again the engineer took the frog
out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.
Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter?
I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, and that
I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want.
Why won't you kiss me?" The engineer said, "Look,
I'm an engineer.I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now
that's cool."
Understanding Engineers - Take Three
What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers
and Civil Engineers? Mechanical Engineers build weapons and Civil Engineers build targets.
Understanding Engineers - Take Four
An architect, an artist and an engineer were
discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress.
The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid
foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he
enjoyed time with his mistress, because the passion and mystery he found
there. The engineer said, "I like both." " Both? "
"Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume
you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and
get some work done."
Understanding Engineers - Take Five
Two engineering students were walking across campus
when one said,"Where did
you get such a great bike?" The second engineer
replied,"Well, I was walking
along yesterday minding my own business when a
beautifulwoman rode up on
this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took
off all her clothes and
said, "Take what you want."
"The second engineer nodded approvingly, "Good
choice. The
clothes probably wouldn't have fit."
Understanding Engineers - Take Six
Once engineers from all fields get together for a
discussion. The topic is "
To which engineering field does GOD belong " ..
Mechanical Engineer: I guess He must be a mechie or
else he
couldn't have developed such a beautiful and
symmetrical body.
Chemical Engineer: Definitely God is a chemical
engineer ... .just look at the various complex
chemical processes in the
human body.Computer Engineer: He is indeed a
computer engineer. Who else
could have written the software for the brain to
work? Civil Engineer: He is
a Civil engineer for sure coz who else could have
built a drainage pipe in a
recreational area !!!!!
To the optimist, the glass is half full. To the pessimist, the glass Is half empty. To the engineer, the glass is twice as big as it needs to be.
Understanding Engineers - Take Two
An engineer was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and
said, "If you kiss me, I'll turn into a beautiful princess." He bent over,
picked up the frog and put it in his pocket. The frog spoke up again and
said, "If you kiss me and turn me back into a
beautiful princess, I will stay with you for one week." The engineer took the
frog out of his pocket,smiled at it and returned it to the pocket.
The frog then cried out,
"If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess,
I'll stay with you and do ANYTHING you want." Again the engineer took the frog
out, smiled at it and put it back into his pocket.
Finally, the frog asked, "What is the matter?
I've told you I'm a beautiful princess, and that
I'll stay with you for a week and do anything you want.
Why won't you kiss me?" The engineer said, "Look,
I'm an engineer.I don't have time for a girlfriend, but a talking frog, now
that's cool."
Understanding Engineers - Take Three
What is the difference between Mechanical Engineers
and Civil Engineers? Mechanical Engineers build weapons and Civil Engineers build targets.
Understanding Engineers - Take Four
An architect, an artist and an engineer were
discussing whether it was better to spend time with the wife or a mistress.
The architect said he enjoyed time with his wife, building a solid
foundation for an enduring relationship. The artist said he
enjoyed time with his mistress, because the passion and mystery he found
there. The engineer said, "I like both." " Both? "
"Yeah. If you have a wife and a mistress, they will each assume
you are spending time with the other woman, and you can go to the lab and
get some work done."
Understanding Engineers - Take Five
Two engineering students were walking across campus
when one said,"Where did
you get such a great bike?" The second engineer
replied,"Well, I was walking
along yesterday minding my own business when a
beautifulwoman rode up on
this bike. She threw the bike to the ground, took
off all her clothes and
said, "Take what you want."
"The second engineer nodded approvingly, "Good
choice. The
clothes probably wouldn't have fit."
Understanding Engineers - Take Six
Once engineers from all fields get together for a
discussion. The topic is "
To which engineering field does GOD belong " ..
Mechanical Engineer: I guess He must be a mechie or
else he
couldn't have developed such a beautiful and
symmetrical body.
Chemical Engineer: Definitely God is a chemical
engineer ... .just look at the various complex
chemical processes in the
human body.Computer Engineer: He is indeed a
computer engineer. Who else
could have written the software for the brain to
work? Civil Engineer: He is
a Civil engineer for sure coz who else could have
built a drainage pipe in a
recreational area !!!!!
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